![\"20111229-225403.jpg\"](\"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/20111229-225403.jpg\")
<\/a><\/p>\nGeorge Carlin’s Dirty Words: Sex
\nGeorge Carlin
\n1937-2008<\/p>\n
Euphemisms for fornication, compiled by comedian George Carlin. If you write letters to Penthouse, here’s a gold mine for ya. (Condoms not included)<\/p>\n
ball
\nbaloney ride
\nbananas and cream
\nbang
\nbeef injection
\nbelly ride
\nbelt
\nblanket drill
\nblow off the loose corns
\nboard
\nboff
\nbone
\nbore
\nbump fur
\nbump uglies
\n~~Long List – click for more <\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
bury your wick
\nbury the bone
\nbush patrol
\nbuzz the brillo cane
\nchange your luck
\nchuck a tread
\ncock up
\ndance the mattress jig
\ndaub of the brush
\ndick
\ndunk
\ndiddle
\ndig your stinger in the honey
\ndip your stick
\ndip your wick
\ndirty work at the crossroads
\ndo
\ndo a dive in the dark
\ndo a slide up the board
\ndog
\ndo it
\ndo the dirty deed
\ndo the horizontal bop
\ndo the nasty
\nfeather-bed jig
\nfeed the dummy
\nfiddle
\nfirk
\nfit end to end
\nfix her plumbing
\nflesh session
\nflop
\nflop in the hay
\nfour-legged frolic
\nfuck
\nget a crumpet
\nget a little
\nget a piece
\nget a snipper
\nget a wet one
\nget into her pants
\nget it on
\nget jack in the orchard
\nget laid
\nget lucky
\nget your ashes hauled
\nget your leather stretched
\nget your noodle wet
\nget your oil changed
\nget some
\nget some action
\nget some ass
\nget some stuff
\nget some tail
\nget some tweeze
\nget your bean waxed
\nget your pole varnished
\ngive her a stab
\ngo all the way
\ngo like a belt-fed motor
\ngo to bed with
\ngo to it
\ngo to town
\ngo vaulting
\ngrease the wheel
\ngrind
\ngrind your tool
\nhanky-panky
\nhave a bit of giblet pie
\nhave a bit of summer cabbage (huh?)
\nhave a blow through
\nhave sex with
\nhide the ferret
\nhide the salami
\nhit on the tail
\nhock
\nhop on
\nhorizontal bop
\nhorizontal hula
\nhorizontal refreshment
\nhose
\nhot roll with cream
\nhump
\nimpale
\nintroduce charlie
\ninvade
\nirish whist
\njazz
\njink
\njob
\njoin paunches
\njounce
\njoy ride
\njug
\njuke
\njump
\njump your bones
\nknock
\nknock off a piece
\nknow
\nlay
\nlay some pipe
\nlay the hip
\nmake feet for children’s shoes
\nmake it
\nmake love
\nmake babies
\nmake the beast with two backs
\nmake whoopie
\nmate
\nmattress dance
\nmess around
\nmingle limbs
\nmix your peanut butter
\nmount
\nmugg
\nnail
\nnib
\nnub
\nnut
\npark your yacht in the hair harbor
\npeel your best end
\npeg
\npestle
\npile-drive
\npin
\nplant your oats
\nplay at all fours
\nplay hide the bone
\nplow
\npluck
\nplug
\npocket the red
\npoke
\npole work
\npop
\npork
\npost a letter
\npound
\npump
\nput a finger in the dyke
\nput the boots to
\nput the tool in the shed
\nquimstick
\nram
\nride
\nrites of venus
\nroast the broomstick
\nroll
\nroll in the hay
\nrock
\nrod
\nroger
\nromp
\nroot
\nroust
\nrub bacon
\nrub up
\nrumble
\nrumple
\nrut
\nsaw off a chunk
\nscore
\nscrew
\nscutz around
\nservice
\nshack up
\nshaft
\nshag
\nshake the sheets
\nshoot between wind and water
\nshoot your wad
\nshort arm practice
\nshove
\nshtup
\nsink the sausage
\nsink the soldier
\nslam
\nslip her a length
\nslip into
\nsplit
\nspoil
\nsquat on the hog
\nsquat jumps in the cucumber patch
\nsqueeze and a squirt
\nstab
\nstable your naggie
\nstrop your beak
\nstrum
\nstuff
\nswing
\ntail-work
\ntake a turn in the stubble
\ntake a turn on shooter’s hill
\ntear off a piece
\nthe disappearing cane trick
\nthe matrimonial polka
\nthread the needle
\nthrow a hump
\nthrow a leg over
\nthump
\ntie the true lover’s knot
\ntip the long one
\ntool in the woods
\ntrim the buff
\ntrip up
\nthe Rhine tumble
\ntumple
\nturn up
\ntwiddle
\nvarnish one’s cane
\nvitamin F
\nwap
\nwham
\nwhat mother did (I’d rather not think about that)
\nwind the clock
\nwork out
\nwork the hairy oracle
\nyard
\nyentz<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
You didn’t think I would go the entire month and not mention the single greatest joy on the planet did you? The Joy of Sex. Wah-wah-wee-wah is that stuff cool!! Soft. Hard. Slow. Fast. Intimate. Group. Alone. Late night. Morning. Sheep. No matter how you express your joy please make sure we all accomplish one […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":771,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[138],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-772","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-joy-through-december"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/20111229-215347.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/772","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=772"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/772\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":779,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/772\/revisions\/779"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/771"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=772"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=772"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=772"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}