{"id":362,"date":"2011-10-31T00:00:25","date_gmt":"2011-10-31T07:00:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/?p=362"},"modified":"2011-10-31T08:46:19","modified_gmt":"2011-10-31T15:46:19","slug":"happy-zombiween-zombie-31","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/?p=362","title":{"rendered":"Happy Zombiween! &#8211; Zombie 31"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m afraid we weren&#8217;t strong enough in the end.  I was bitten.  Moments after learning that it all started during World War II and the true whereabouts of one major douche of an antichrist, I felt soft familiar lips with a foreign agenda.  My wife of nearly a year, now a zombie, ripped into my torso and took the rib she so justly deserved.  As I lay here typing these final words before my horrific end I can&#8217;t help but feel a euphoric peace for all mankind.  How ironic that in the end everyone gets what they want.  Money no longer matters.  No politics.  Unwanted pregnancy is at an all time low.  Real estate mortgage crisis is solved.  No debates about citizenship.  Divorce is non-existent.  Everyone on the planet has eternal life if they follow their passion&#8230;brains.  And in the grand scheme of things, we&#8217;re all the same race, Zombie.  Happy Halloween!<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"420\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/DiRIchO4dLM\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m afraid we weren&#8217;t strong enough in the end. I was bitten. Moments after learning that it all started during World War II and the true whereabouts of one major douche of an antichrist, I felt soft familiar lips with a foreign agenda. My wife of nearly a year, now a zombie, ripped into my [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":369,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,8,9],"tags":[13,84,16,14,20,11,15,54,12,56,108,83,81],"class_list":["post-362","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-media","category-photositook","category-zombie-october","tag-comedy","tag-fun","tag-funny","tag-halloween","tag-humor","tag-james-silverman","tag-october","tag-pandemic","tag-zombie","tag-zombiedom","tag-zombies","tag-zombify","tag-zombtober"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/JamesSilverman_Zombie31.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/362","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=362"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/362\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":365,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/362\/revisions\/365"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/369"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=362"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=362"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ijamessilverman.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=362"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}